Dearest Friends and Family,

Another year passes and we are grateful for all our small adventures and life events. This year was mostly a year of work and training, but we are loving our little life here in Niles.

Julan is finishing his last year of middle school. He is doing well with his studies and we are proud of his hard work to improve himself in time management, writing, and math. He had another fun swim season over the summer and is currently training during the fall for next summer. He is growing into a young man, and we are managing the growth spurts and constant need for new shoes and pants.

Gigi decided over the summer to try her hand at principalship. She is now the principal of Walnut Grove Elementary in Pleasanton, CA. Littles bring a new joy and new challenges in supporting education. She has now experienced high school, middle school, summer school and even preschool. Her team at the school are amazing and the students are wonderful to watch grow.

Jude keeps expanding his cooking repertoire and keeping Julan and Gigi happily fed and taken care of. He and his friends spend evenings making art, adding to our house of color. 

We hope everyone is healthy and happy!

We love you and happy holidays,

Jude (Teddy), Gigi, and Julan

Letter to Middle School

 Dear Middle School Administrator,

My son is joining your school next year and he is super excited for this opportunity. He is feeling a need to expand his friend group, to find “his people” that will understand him. He explored the various electives you offer so he can do more than just English, math, writing and history. Yet, I see his apprehension. He can predict how much work is coming his way, and is already having belly aches about it. The joyous feeling of coming to school to “just learn” has disappeared with endless projects that never seem to be done on time, disappointed looks that he isn’t meeting expectations, and eye rolling from peers who seem to have it all together.

As a parent, I am having belly aches as I see his last moments of elementary school. All the little babies of early grades have blossomed into young adults.  The baby chub has moved to awkward bodies that are stretched in various ways, as they transition to the adults we are guiding them to become. This elementary time when all parents seem to rally around the kids to see them grow together, I see the community rallying to see my kid succeed along with the others. In middle school, I am hearing more about what I need to do to get my “student” ready for college, ready for sports, ready for __________. The community feels less to support each other as we move toward the individual. The parent support diminishes as bullying increases with “who is better than who” feelings we perpetuate in person and online. We start to criticize who is raising their children better or worse as we observe how our kids handle all the various social and academic moments they experience in a day. 

Moving up to the middle school grades is a transitional time for students, and for parents. People we used for support at the elementary level may not be available now, as we navigate this job called parenthood. If I seem a little off or defensive, it may be coming from a place of hurt as the school, the parent, the community used to support me and my child. Now, I am feeling on my own.

We are excited for this transition, and mourning the moments gone as they transition to memories. 

Thank you,

Mom of a middle school boy

Happy Holidays 2021!

 Happy Holidays from the Silva Family! 

This year has been relatively quiet as the pandemic has kept us close to home.

Highlights from Julan (11) who is the main driver of most of our activities: 

• Completed 5th grade remotely and now rocking the 6th grade on site with all the book reports, math concepts, exams and student council! 
• Played baseball in spring and made All-Stars, although the team did not advance past the first round. 
• Was able to have a modified swim team season this summer, and will be moving up next year to two lap (50 m) swims with flip turns! Freestyle, breaststroke dominate, but he has a mean backstroke as well.
• Finding interest in mythology, dragon lore, all things magical, and Pokemon. He has even picked up writing his own stories now, so watch out literary world. 

Jude spends his days learning new recipes and warms our bellies with wonderful dishes. Gigi is still a vice-principal at middle school in Pleasanton, CA, and trying to navigate education in a COVID-laden world. 

We are all blessed to stay healthy during this time and love to see family and friends in person as we venture out. We hope to see more people soon and ready to increase our adventures again. 

We love all you, 

Gigi, Jude and Julan 

Happy Holidays 2020

Dusting off this old blog with all my musings from my youthful self to send out our holiday greetings. The only picture I could think of for this year's holiday "card" is the one I took of the little guy while hiking the caves at Pinnacles National Park.

Our family here has not had to deal with the trials of this year directly, yet we share the angst of knowing it will be crushing should it befall us, and share anxiety of uncertainty. We are all blessed to be healthy and employed. What a year to start an administrator job! Education has taken on this challenge of remote teaching, and I am proud of how much educators have moved in response to student and family needs.  I never would have predicted a few months ago how much I would know about PPE protocol, ingress vs. egress, masks of various sizes, but here I am. The job is still busy but eery to work on a campus with little to no children.

We focused on our home in Fremont, CA (in the town of Niles) and our health. Home projects took precedent and as we opened one project, another would bubble up. In between projects, we still got out for bike rides, walks and the occasional pool opportunities. 

Little guy turned 10 years old this year and became the proud parent of a cute black rabbit named Bear. He is missing his friends and school routine, but making the best of it and learning new strategies to stay engaged. He is missing hugs terribly so we all give extra ones around the house.

My mate turned 60 this year and we celebrated quietly with family zooms and lots of good food. He has been the rock little guy relies upon when the pressing times hits him. 

We are spending the holidays quietly at home, which is not unusual for us, but more important as we hope to spend more time with friends and family this coming new year. We count our blessings and health of our family. My mate's mother turned 90 this year and still staying strong as ever. Our time on Skype, Messenger and Zoom is precious with both families. 

We wish everyone a safe, warm and joyful holiday and coming new year. 

Missing Me

I rushed home today (like every day), exhausted and ready to give up on the idea of cooking dinner. Driving down our street, I thought of take-out Italian or tacos. As I reached the top of our stairs, I realized the door was locked? Locked? The boys are out?

Realizing I could put my bags down without a baby to carry, I raced to use the restroom before a baby would scream for hugs and play time. Boys still out...could it be I could get a dinner together?

Just having 45 minutes to myself accomplished so much: decompression, bathroom break, change of clothes, a full meal prep WITH CLEANUP, and time to read a couple of recipes and write this blog.

When will "me" time happen again?

Ten Years

The year 2000 was a transition year for me as I graduated from college and I was set to save the world. I remember the excitement I felt in February as I shoveled snow for the last time, knowing I was moving to California temporarily in June as I venture on to my Peace Corps adventure in the South Pacific later that year.

My whimsical move to California (to help drive a friend cross country in a U-haul) was meant as a fun filled transition stop. I am still here. The Peace Corps fell through as they felt my lungs were not up to the adventure, and I had massive debt from school…that is, I needed to find real work.

As I toiled over my next move (I was still trying to save the world), my mate crossed my path late 2000. Recoiling from the thought of being strapped down by a relationship, I told him not to get attached. We will be married 10 years in September. I guess he got me with the comment, “You can do whatever you want…just don’t leave me”.

Our story is interesting because we almost didn’t meet. His friend Mike stepped in front of my mate’s car to make sure he attended an art show (to help add culture to my mate’s life). I was working for the art show trying to make some commission (while pouring wine), and in walks the man who becomes my best friend and family. Along with Mike, Susy and Steve, I made a little family niche here in California as my siblings are spread out along the east coast.

For the past ten years, I did what I wanted: I earned a graduate degree, found a profession I love, traveled to a few countries, developed a photography business, and met some amazing people.

Now it’s 2011. I am in transition again as I learn to be a mother; but it seems so surreal. Everything seems to be going so fast, and I don’t feel like I am savoring the moments. I cling to my photographs for those memories. I walked by the place I met my mate but it was torn down last year.

And our dear friend Mike, carefree and joyful, passed away January 3rd, 2011, after his long battle with cancer. We are all in disbelief, and my heart breaks for his wife and two young children. He didn’t make his 50th birthday, and his kids are under the age of 10…how is this fair? He will be a bright angel, though, watching us from heaven, helping us cherish the tiny moments that really make life wonderful.

PHOTOS OF MIKE THROUGH THESE YEARS

Ted & Mike wandering Chinatown, 2000

Susi, Mike & Teddy at the Baldwin House, 2000

Mike's Wedding Gift--Taking us to IKEA for furniture, 2001

Mike, Susi, Coco joining in on a visit from Chesca and the girls

Despedida for Mike & Family, 2006

Last Picture of the Azcueta Family before they drove to Milwaukee, WI, 2006

Azcueta 50th Anniversary Celebration in Manila, Philippines, 2007

Mike & Ted, 2007

Mike, Steve and Ted reunite in 2000 after 20+ years

Mike, Steve and Ted in 2006 before Mike leaves for Wisconsin

Motherly Insight

Many people have greeted me a Happy Mother’s Day, which is sweet, but I still don’t feel quite like a mother since the little guy is just using my body to grow. I feel the true test of motherhood is the development of a decent human being who thinks about his/her community, family and overall health of society. While I teach youth and contribute a part to this goal, I still haven’t started my adventure in shaping the future of a little one.

But several women in my life have…particularly one, my own mom. We all go through key developmental stages in life, yet we are all unique. My mother went through seven unique developmental stages of children, and managed to get all us through to where we are now. While she is not perfect and no mother can be, we learned many new things, developed our own unique lives and she continues to support us on our paths.

So now I have a new man about to enter the world, and while I know I won’t be perfect at developing his important life events, I hope I can provide as much support, love and education as my mother does. She (and us) lost her mother this past week to old age so she is using the knowledge Grandma gave her to guide us through our motherhood.

I love you mom.